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The BEST Police Comments!!!

The following 15 Police Comments were taken off of actual police car videos around the country.

#15  "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new.  They'll stretch out after you wear them awhile."

#14  "Take your hands off the car, and I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

#13  "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12  "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second?  In case you didn't know that is the average speed of a
         9 mm bullet fired from my gun."

#11  "So you don't know how fast you were going.  I guess that means I can write anything I want on the
         ticket, huh?"

#10  "Yes, Sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help.  Oh
, did I mention that I am
         the shift supervisor?"

#9  "Warning!  You want a warning?  O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another

#8  "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat
         or a dog?"

#7   "Fair?  You want me to be fair?  Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy,
         and step in
monkey doo-doo."

#6  "Yeah, we have a quota.  Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

#5   "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

#4   "Just how big were those two beers?"

#3   "No
, sir, we don't have quotas anymore.  We used to have quotas but now we're allowed to write as
         many tickets as we want."

#2   "I'm glad to hear the Chief of Police is a good personal friend of yours.  At least you know someone
         who can post your bail."

And.................... THE BEST ONE !!!!!!!

#1  "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here.

Jan Anderson

Copyright © 2006, Jace Carlton.  All International Rights Reserved.
Copyright © 2005-2013, Jace Carlton.  All International Rights Reserved.